My husband and I were driving around the other day and talked about people from our past. Often I think about friends or non friends from my past and wonder where they are at now. I reply different scenes from our shared history and often wonder how things would have been had I done things differently.
Am I the only one who regrets a lot of stupid decisions of my past and dwells on them daily? Probably. So many people have influenced me and changed me over the years and I wonder if they even realize how much they have impacted others lives? And then I wonder have I done that for anyone? Do any of these people think about me periodically? Or was I simply that insignificant that no one remembers who I was? I tried to be invisible most of my life so I wouldn't be surprised if people didn't even remember who I was. Isn't it sad that I care about that? Maybe it is because I have tried to remember almost everyone I have met, I still remember friends from grade school, enemies too.
Moral of the story is, I think too much. I need to let the past go and embrace the people who want to be in my life now. I can pine over lost relationships for hours but those who matter stuck around. I will always look back fondly at friends, even enemies from my past because they helped me become who I am today. But who I am today is not anywhere near who I was back then so I need to keep remembering that and move forward.
On the plus side, my husband does the same thing… so at least I am not alone in that.
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